Somewhere, at a point in time and space, me and Shashank became friends.
That point of time and space hence became so badass that all the surrounding points of time and space couldn't resist it, and collapsed into it, blurring that moment in everyone's heads, and leaving only the one instant behind - the moment we became friends.
You're probably some chump on the other side of the screen, wondering why you're even bothering to read this.
Let me tell you why -
Because ever since Jay and Viru, you've never seen another tale about a friendship so awesome that you went to your pillow and cried manly tears of awesomeness (even if you aren't a man - yes, it's that awesome).
Since I'm no Morgan Freeman, you will not be getting an awesome voice over, no matter how much you desire it. (However, if you can imagine that he's reading this to you, it'll seriously turn this awesome post into the very epitome of awesomeness people use as a yardstick thousands of years into the future)
So make yourself comfortable. Get your cup of coffee, fold your newspaper and throw it into the bin, and put on that comfy pair of pjs you wish you owned. It's about time you experienced incidents from the greatest friendship of the 21st century.
Since this is beyond any other form of logic, lets begin this recounting chronologically.
You see, Shashank and I didn't start off as friends. In fact, to be completely honest, we started off as pseudo-ambivalent enemies. To make things simpler, I'll be nice and start from the beginning, so that your puny mortal brain can keep up.
Both me and shashank began our 11th grade in the Army Public School, Bhopal. The first few days were the general chaos, as nobody (barring me) knew shit about what they were going to do with their future, and between general confusion and mutual friends, me and him became what one would call cordial acquaintances. Following that, however, the chump (as he'd not imbibed any of my awesomeness - he was still a slow learner back then), made the idiotic decision that he would try to become an engineer. Me, being the smart me that I was, immediately refused to acknowledge him as a possible friend of mine, and helped along by a difference in divisions, we went our own ways.
Now what I must mention here, is that I was a silent guy when I was in eleventh grade. And by silent, I meant silent-hanging-from-the-ceiling-deep-in-though type of silent, not his-periods-are-on kind of silent (not that they didn't exist - I simply wasn't one of 'em). Also, I refused to smile at the senile anecdotes and two liners my classmates labeled "jokes" (if anything was a joke, it was their definition of one). Being the lonely, silent, no too friendly type, everyone decided to make fun of me, and started off this phenomenon of writing LOL wherever they could (on book covers, walls, errant flying pages, crippled unicorns and sterile dragons and whatnot), presumably so that I would laugh/smile and prove my humanity (How does smiling make you human? I mean, is that how the dudes in the cave 3K years ago knew each other? That smiling buffon there is my species. No wonder the planet is in shambles). Although I must mention, the exact motivation behind it remains cloudy till date (even it's perpetrators aren't sure why, exactly, they did what they did). Amongst those buffoons, was my (now) beloved friend, Shank. Questioning my humanity (on the basis of a smile, no less) and making a human chain which chanted LOL AND followed me to the corners of the school did no wonders for his standing in my eyes, further helped along by the pedophile mustache he then adorned himself with.
For nearly an year after that, we remained mere acquaintances, if somewhat frosty towards each other (we each though the other to be weird crackpots - which is the truth, anyway). This went on, until there came to our principal's attention that there was a regional level debate on the cards, and her usual team of buffoons was nowhere near good enough to participate. This led to a wild hunt for talent, which then, led to (no surprises here) me, the chump, and a girl named Ishita. Now, had this been a novel, I'd have written an entire chapter on her, however, this isn't one (appearances can be deceiving), and hence all you'll get is her name and the fact that at no point of time were either of us romantically involved with her (so your love triangle fantasy shall stay unfulfilled). It then proceeded to a long ass train journey, where I immediately crushed the ice with the awesome pizza I'd gotten from Dominoes (I still have a picture of me feasting on it - I'm such a beast! B|). Also, if you do not know what a pizza is, I suggest you google the word harakiri and apply the technique to yourself. I've heard it relieves you of your ignorance almost immediately, while still saving some honor, so that someone can still deliver an eulogy at your funeral.
One train journey later, we arrived at our destination - Naseerabad, which, excluding us, had nothing worthy of anyone's attention in it. Off we went, to our rooms, to discover that we shared a room (the lulz), though, by the mercy of god, we each had a bed to ourselves. This began a trip where we made tons of friends, clicked a shit ton of pictures (that was just me - he simply featured in them), visited the famous Dargah, and misplaced a set of underpants. Also, someone(s) fell in love (nothing of note, since neither of them went anywhere). Suffice to say, we, and (thanks to us) everyone around us, had the time of their lives. Somewhere in that crazy ride, Shashank and I grew to trust each other (probably helped along by the fact that he'd shaved off his pedo-stache, and my genral aura of awesomeness), and had shit tons of fun. Oh and, the debate - Shashank won the best interjector (because, honestly, he took my advice), and I won nothing (because I didn't). It was one of them hardcore events, so nobody got a trinket for participating. Honestly, nobody gave a fuck either.
Well, with that behind us, we discovered how truly awesome the other one was (Shashank had been working hard on it), and decided tell our past to go fuck itself. On to the friendship.
If I mention all the tales of awesomeness, you'll still be reading this while your grandkids wet themselves about the trillion dollar movie based on our lives. And still not be done. Also, there's the small matter of your brain exploding from the sheer awesomeness you'll be exposed to, if I continue the Adventures of Reizo and Shashank.
Me, being the kind soul I am, will just mention a few of the events that make our friendship worthy of the awesomeness it lays claim to, and you can use your imagination to try to comprehend how amazing it really is (not that your imagination can even come close to the truth - but you can certainly try).
Well, lets see - lets not count the endless hours of gaming, basketball, talking around, pranks and dance. Let's ignore all the night outs and the Pepsi on the floor. Let's also turn a blind eye towards the female half of the human species, and our (mis)adventures there too.
Even if all of that had never happened, Shashank and I would still have been the chaddi buddies we already are. You see, when I crashed my bike and almost drove a rock through my abdomen, he came and carried me to his mom, accompanied me to the hospital, and when all the bandaging, medication and advice were said and done, got me another bottle of Pepsi. You see, when I helped him write his personal essay, I realized how hard it had been for him to cope with his more than an year long stay in the hospital, lying crippled on a bed. You see, he was the first person I ever opened up to, about my experiences in Kota.
You see, we applied for USA together, and made it here together.
You see?
I know you don't. But I forgive you, because that's something my friendship has taught me.
How to forgive idiots and co-exist with them.
I'd highly recommend you try it out, too.
That point of time and space hence became so badass that all the surrounding points of time and space couldn't resist it, and collapsed into it, blurring that moment in everyone's heads, and leaving only the one instant behind - the moment we became friends.
You're probably some chump on the other side of the screen, wondering why you're even bothering to read this.
Let me tell you why -
Because ever since Jay and Viru, you've never seen another tale about a friendship so awesome that you went to your pillow and cried manly tears of awesomeness (even if you aren't a man - yes, it's that awesome).
Since I'm no Morgan Freeman, you will not be getting an awesome voice over, no matter how much you desire it. (However, if you can imagine that he's reading this to you, it'll seriously turn this awesome post into the very epitome of awesomeness people use as a yardstick thousands of years into the future)
So make yourself comfortable. Get your cup of coffee, fold your newspaper and throw it into the bin, and put on that comfy pair of pjs you wish you owned. It's about time you experienced incidents from the greatest friendship of the 21st century.
Since this is beyond any other form of logic, lets begin this recounting chronologically.
You see, Shashank and I didn't start off as friends. In fact, to be completely honest, we started off as pseudo-ambivalent enemies. To make things simpler, I'll be nice and start from the beginning, so that your puny mortal brain can keep up.
Both me and shashank began our 11th grade in the Army Public School, Bhopal. The first few days were the general chaos, as nobody (barring me) knew shit about what they were going to do with their future, and between general confusion and mutual friends, me and him became what one would call cordial acquaintances. Following that, however, the chump (as he'd not imbibed any of my awesomeness - he was still a slow learner back then), made the idiotic decision that he would try to become an engineer. Me, being the smart me that I was, immediately refused to acknowledge him as a possible friend of mine, and helped along by a difference in divisions, we went our own ways.
Now what I must mention here, is that I was a silent guy when I was in eleventh grade. And by silent, I meant silent-hanging-from-the-ceiling-deep-in-though type of silent, not his-periods-are-on kind of silent (not that they didn't exist - I simply wasn't one of 'em). Also, I refused to smile at the senile anecdotes and two liners my classmates labeled "jokes" (if anything was a joke, it was their definition of one). Being the lonely, silent, no too friendly type, everyone decided to make fun of me, and started off this phenomenon of writing LOL wherever they could (on book covers, walls, errant flying pages, crippled unicorns and sterile dragons and whatnot), presumably so that I would laugh/smile and prove my humanity (How does smiling make you human? I mean, is that how the dudes in the cave 3K years ago knew each other? That smiling buffon there is my species. No wonder the planet is in shambles). Although I must mention, the exact motivation behind it remains cloudy till date (even it's perpetrators aren't sure why, exactly, they did what they did). Amongst those buffoons, was my (now) beloved friend, Shank. Questioning my humanity (on the basis of a smile, no less) and making a human chain which chanted LOL AND followed me to the corners of the school did no wonders for his standing in my eyes, further helped along by the pedophile mustache he then adorned himself with.
For nearly an year after that, we remained mere acquaintances, if somewhat frosty towards each other (we each though the other to be weird crackpots - which is the truth, anyway). This went on, until there came to our principal's attention that there was a regional level debate on the cards, and her usual team of buffoons was nowhere near good enough to participate. This led to a wild hunt for talent, which then, led to (no surprises here) me, the chump, and a girl named Ishita. Now, had this been a novel, I'd have written an entire chapter on her, however, this isn't one (appearances can be deceiving), and hence all you'll get is her name and the fact that at no point of time were either of us romantically involved with her (so your love triangle fantasy shall stay unfulfilled). It then proceeded to a long ass train journey, where I immediately crushed the ice with the awesome pizza I'd gotten from Dominoes (I still have a picture of me feasting on it - I'm such a beast! B|). Also, if you do not know what a pizza is, I suggest you google the word harakiri and apply the technique to yourself. I've heard it relieves you of your ignorance almost immediately, while still saving some honor, so that someone can still deliver an eulogy at your funeral.
One train journey later, we arrived at our destination - Naseerabad, which, excluding us, had nothing worthy of anyone's attention in it. Off we went, to our rooms, to discover that we shared a room (the lulz), though, by the mercy of god, we each had a bed to ourselves. This began a trip where we made tons of friends, clicked a shit ton of pictures (that was just me - he simply featured in them), visited the famous Dargah, and misplaced a set of underpants. Also, someone(s) fell in love (nothing of note, since neither of them went anywhere). Suffice to say, we, and (thanks to us) everyone around us, had the time of their lives. Somewhere in that crazy ride, Shashank and I grew to trust each other (probably helped along by the fact that he'd shaved off his pedo-stache, and my genral aura of awesomeness), and had shit tons of fun. Oh and, the debate - Shashank won the best interjector (because, honestly, he took my advice), and I won nothing (because I didn't). It was one of them hardcore events, so nobody got a trinket for participating. Honestly, nobody gave a fuck either.
Well, with that behind us, we discovered how truly awesome the other one was (Shashank had been working hard on it), and decided tell our past to go fuck itself. On to the friendship.
If I mention all the tales of awesomeness, you'll still be reading this while your grandkids wet themselves about the trillion dollar movie based on our lives. And still not be done. Also, there's the small matter of your brain exploding from the sheer awesomeness you'll be exposed to, if I continue the Adventures of Reizo and Shashank.
Me, being the kind soul I am, will just mention a few of the events that make our friendship worthy of the awesomeness it lays claim to, and you can use your imagination to try to comprehend how amazing it really is (not that your imagination can even come close to the truth - but you can certainly try).
Well, lets see - lets not count the endless hours of gaming, basketball, talking around, pranks and dance. Let's ignore all the night outs and the Pepsi on the floor. Let's also turn a blind eye towards the female half of the human species, and our (mis)adventures there too.
Even if all of that had never happened, Shashank and I would still have been the chaddi buddies we already are. You see, when I crashed my bike and almost drove a rock through my abdomen, he came and carried me to his mom, accompanied me to the hospital, and when all the bandaging, medication and advice were said and done, got me another bottle of Pepsi. You see, when I helped him write his personal essay, I realized how hard it had been for him to cope with his more than an year long stay in the hospital, lying crippled on a bed. You see, he was the first person I ever opened up to, about my experiences in Kota.
You see, we applied for USA together, and made it here together.
You see?
I know you don't. But I forgive you, because that's something my friendship has taught me.
How to forgive idiots and co-exist with them.
I'd highly recommend you try it out, too.
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